Saturday, May 28, 2011


I skipped out on the blog yesterday.  I apologize.  Really.

It's Memorial Day weekend (as you probably know) and I'm spending time with the fam.  My amazing husband and wonderful daughter.

I won't be back til Tuesday but felt I should at least pop over and let y'all know!

Enjoy your long weekend and please remember our troops and keep them in your prayers.  Thank God for all they've done for us and our freedom!!



Thursday, May 26, 2011


I really need to wash my truck.  And mow the yard.

Kidding, kidding.  (Ok, I do need to wash my truck.)  But I spent my morning mowing and pulling weeds.  My yard is in the progress of being transformed and recently we tilled the entire backyard and laid sod in a certain pattern.  Now we need to go back and fill in the giant dirt patches with beds and shrubs and flowers and mulch and river rock and...  you get the picture.  PS - this picture is not of my yard, or my truck.

In those giant dirt patches there have been weeds sprouting.  And so I strapped on my gardening gloves and went to work.  The weed pulling today was actually a lot of fun!  Because we had tilled recently the weeds that were there didn't have strong root systems.  They came right up with a gently pull.  Joy!

As I was working I couldn't help but think about how sin in our lives is like a weed.  When we let little sins stay they tend not to stay little.  They grow.  And the roots dig deep.  If ignored, weeds can take over an entire yard (or truck as shown above) and kill everything living in their path.  Sin grows and spreads like a disease and can take over your life.  It can damage your health, your relationships, your finances, your faith.  

I'm suggesting that we keep our noses in the Word of God and keep our prayer lives active in order to weed the sin out of our lives.  And when it does sprout up - it will be much easier to pull by the roots and get rid of.  

Song of Solomon 2:15

15 Catch for us the foxes,
   the little foxes
that ruin the vineyards,
   our vineyards that are in bloom.

(Foxes.  Weeds.  You get the idea.)

Say your prayers,
Sweet dreams,
I love you,


Wednesday, May 25, 2011


Can I share with you a few tips that really help me keep my prayer life real?

  1. Pray daily.  Many times a day.
  2. Talk to God.  Talk to Jesus.  They know your heart and can understand your words.  You don't have to get all King James on them.  Prayer doesn't have to be made complex or extravagant.
  3. The Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf and is ready to do the praying for you if  you don't know what to say.  Ask for His help.
  4. If you tell someone that you'll pray for them, for goodness sakes DO IT.  Don't let 'prayer requests' be a thin disguise for Christian gossip.  God knows the difference.
  5. Pray daily.  Many times a day.
If you need some material to work with please consider the following:

Victims of the recent tornados.
Children with pediatric cancer.
Our world leaders, our pastors and our emergency personnel.
Folks who are lost in this world and don't have a home to go to.  
The mentally ill suffering silently or in hospitals and prisons.
Your friends, family and most of all your enemies.

Remember to be THANKFUL, ASK FOR FORGIVENESS, and PRAISE GOD in each prayer.

Something my sisters (have I mentioned that I have 5? and a brother) and I always said before going to sleep:

Say your prayers... sweet dreams... I love you... Good night!

Nighty, night my sweet readers.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

A Promising Future - and what to do until then...

Last post on waiting, I promise.  :)

PS - I have memory loss issues both short term and long term and cannot really promise this will be the last post on waiting as I might forget that I wrote about it already.

Tired of sitting around like a bump on a log?  Is there action to take while you're waiting on God to fulfill His promises or answer your prayers?

You bet!!  Here are some of the verses that really helped me as I climbed out of the pit.

Where is your focus?  Where is Jeremiah’s focus here…

Lamentations 3:19-23 

 19 I remember my affliction and my wandering,
   the bitterness and the gall.
20 I well remember them,
   and my soul is downcast within me.

Then Jeremiah changed his focus…

21 Yet this I call to mind
   and therefore I have hope:
 22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
   for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
   great is your faithfulness.
 25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
   to the one who seeks him;
26 it is good to wait quietly
   for the salvation of the LORD. 

Know where to find your strength...  

Isaiah 40:27-31 

27 Why do you complain, Jacob?
   Why do you say, Israel,
“My way is hidden from the LORD;
   my cause is disregarded by my God”?

28 Do you not know?
   Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
   the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
   and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
   and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
   and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
   will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
   they will run and not grow weary,
   they will walk and not be faint. 
God's grace will come.  His promise will be kept.  You will be blessed...

Isaiah 30:18

 18 Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you;
   therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.
For the LORD is a God of justice.
   Blessed are all who wait for him!

Where is your hope?

Psalm 130:5

 5 I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits,
   and in his word I put my hope.

How can you know that God will keep His word?

Isaiah 55:10-11

10 As the rain and the snow
   come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
   without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
   so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
   It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
   and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

How do the two verses prior reassure us when the delay is long or the process is confusing?

Isaiah 55:8-9

 8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
   neither are your ways my ways,”
            declares the LORD.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
   and my thoughts than your thoughts. 

What are the benefits of believing God while we wait?

Romans 15:13

 13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

So what will you do between now and the big day?

Monday, May 23, 2011

Does Jesus Wear Rose Colored Glasses?

I have seen his ways, but I will heal him;
I will guide him and restore comfort to him, 
creating praise on the lips of the mourners in Israel.
Isaiah 57:18
God saw my ways.  He knew every sin that I had committed, He knew each and every one of my days before the first one came to pass.  He saw me there in the mud.  Completely broken.  With no redeeming qualities except for one:


And He chose to heal me.  He guided me home and restored comfort in my heart, mind and spirit.  This comfort and peace is so real and so unbelievably good that I have a hard time believing that I was the wreck that I was in 2010.  I will be praising God as long as I have breath to do it.

Waiting on His promises - that is hard work, I know.  But He gives the strength for any task He asks of us.  We must keep our eyes on Jesus.  Drown out the whispers of the Evil One with praise and prayers to our Lord in heaven.

God brings comfort to the contrite.  He lives forever in a high and holy place, but also with the lowly in spirit.  We will never be good enough to deserve it.  And thankfully we'll never need to be.

Jesus - I am yours.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

And So We Wait

Waiting on Jesus.  Another day without our Savior on earth.  It seems really funny to me that one man had preached (and actually had people believing) that he had figured out the day Jesus would come back.  But Matthew 24:36 clearly says that no one knows the day or the hour that Jesus will return, not even Jesus himself.

God has purpose in waiting to fulfill His promises.

I've been a little reserved in sharing the whole story of my desert experience here on this blog.  But I am going to do it, honestly and openly, in hopes that my transparency might bless someone else.  If anything here resonates with you please feel free to contact me.  Or seek help.  Please.

In January of 2010 I began to long for Jesus.  I couldn't stop thinking about how I wanted to be with Him.  And rather than dive into my bible in order to be closer, I let my mind wander.  Little by little I fell into a serious depression.  It was a perfect storm of emotional stress (fertility/hormone treatment), physical stress (job transition), and mental stress (twisted thinking).  As the months went by I couldn't understand why God was holding Himself back from me.  Why wasn't He answering my prayers?  I wasn't praying for something evil.  I was praying for a baby (didn't He say to multiply and inhabit the earth?) and I was praying that Jesus would return (throw me a bone! I'm ready to live with You.).  But nothing.  No baby.  And He didn't take me to heaven either.  What started as a seemingly innocent request twisted into suicidal thoughts and a downward spiral like I never thought possible.  If you don't know me personally you're just going to have to believe me when I say that I had a really, really good life.  Married to a wonderful man, mother of a beautiful girl.  Loved by many, many friends.  A homeowner, very little debt, with our slice of the American dream.  What more could a girl want?  

But I did my very best to rebel against God and His love for me.  My husband and his love for me.  If the semi truck in the oncoming lane wasn't going to drift over and send me straight to Jesus then I would just walk away from everything I knew and go live in a van under a bridge.  After a few weeks completely detached from reality I was saved by my husband.  I told him everything I was going through.  After a lot of tears, a few phone calls, and one doctor visit my husband took me (voluntarily) to the hospital.  I was admitted to the psych ward and yes it is as horrific as you might think.  That was rock bottom.

With the help of prayers from others, anti-depressants, and most of all - my husband's faith, love and sheer dependence on God; I began to crawl my way out of the pit.  It was a long hard journey.  I still have to live with consequences and memories of that horrible season.  But it's over.  

Could God really have a purpose in making me wait?  Absolutely.  I know Jesus like I never could have before.  I am humbled because I realize what a sinner I am.  The things that I did during this season - He died for those actions.  It breaks my heart that my sins were on Him as He died on the cross.  And It took time to accept it.  It took time to accept His love.  It took time to find my true identity.  It took waiting.  But God had a purpose in it all.  Oh, did He ever.

God blesses the meek and humble.  He has lifted me out of the mud.  Wiped me clean.  And called me His.  And today I read His word, I do all I can to glorify His name, and I share it all with anyone who will listen.

Redeemed by Him,

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Psalm 118:24

This is day that the Lord has made!
Let us rejoice and be glad in it!!

The Wheelbarrow

I came across this story last year while I was on the road to trusting God with my life.

The Wheelbarrow Story goes something like this:

Charles Blondin was a famous tightrope walker in the 1800's.  He had done amazing stunts all over the world and had never fallen.  His manager had seen him perform many times.  The two men came to Niagara Falls where Blondin would string a rope across the raging falls.  Many people came to watch him as he walked the rope.  He walked blindfolded.  He walked on stilts.  He rode a bicycle.  The crowd was very impressed.  Charles Blondin then pushed a wheelbarrow across the falls on the tightrope.  His manager, who had seen him many times do these tricks, was there.  Blondin asked this man if he trusted that he could push the wheelbarrow back to the other side of the falls.  "Of course!  I have seen you do this before.  You have never fallen!  Of course, I believe you can do this.  I trust you."

And Blondin said, "Then get in the wheelbarrow."


I have known God my entire life.  I have believed in Him.  I have believed His word. 

But I found that believing and trusting are not one in the same.  It wasn't an easy thing to do.  To make a decision to get in the wheelbarrow.  It was, in fact, the scariest thing I've ever done.  And I continue to make that choice each morning.

Safety should not be our god.

The safest place to be is with God Himself. 

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Who am I?

I recently went on a search to figure out who I was.  Not in an Eat, Pray, Love kind of way (yes, I have the book, no I haven't read it or seen the movie.)  There is a great song that says: "I don't think Hank done it this way."  I don't think Julia Roberts done it this way, either.
I searched and found these descriptions in Romans, Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Colossians and Timothy.  This isn’t me being arrogant.  I certainly don’t deserve this identity and could never have earned it.  These are truths from the Word of God. 

I am justified
No condemnation awaits me
I am set free from the law of sin that leads to death
I am made holy and acceptable 
I am righteous
I will be made alive at the resurrection
I am a new creation
I receive God's righteousness
I am one with other believers
I am blessed with every spiritual blessing
I am holy and blameless
I am God's child
I am under Christ's authority
I belong to God by the Holy Spirit
I have been raised up to sit with Christ in glory
I am God's work of art
I am near to God
I am promised blessings
I can come with freedom and confidence into God's presence
I am a member of Christ's body, the Church
I am made complete
I am set free from our sin nature
I have eternal glory

There are times that I certainly don't feel these truths with my emotions and my brain can't quite comprehend a few of them even on my good days.

But God says they are true.

And so they are.

Tomorrow I will tell you a bit more about what I've learned in the past year.  About God.  About myself.  About His amazing promises. 

Until then,


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Rise and Shine

“We can only appreciate the 
miracle of a sunrise
if we have waited in the darkness.”
-Author Unknown

I have waited in the darkness.  

I have waited alongside my husband and daughter.  Sitting quietly, whispering, and giggling.  Wondering, is it is our imaginations that it is getting lighter?   Or is the sunrise really near?

And then in glorious, slow motion we see the peak of this orange arch coming up over the bay.  And it gets bigger and bigger until we notice that we are no longer sitting in the dark.  We are no longer whispering or giggling.  We are in awe of the gift that God has presented to us.  Once again.

It is a new day.

And we are in love.  So many possibilities arise with the sun.  We are alive.

What are you waiting for?

“Arise, shine, for your light has come,
   and the glory of the LORD rises upon you."
Isaiah 60:1